Beyond “This or That”
All this time I’ve been wrestling with a major decision: “this OR that?” When the question was never “this OR that?” It was far more expansive. It invited deeper introspection and the abandonment of an outdated way of thinking and decision-making.
My personal and professional growth has reached a plateau that now nudges me to begin exploring again outside of my current location for a new home base. Movement and exploration in the external world has always been key to my inner world expansion and is deeply rooted in my purpose. I’ve had a lifelong passion for long-distance travel and cultural exploration that I have felt called share through creative outlets such as: art, storytelling, curated retreats, and energy sessions. This nudge to move on had me contemplating, “where to next?” or more specifically, choosing between “this” OR “that”?
I had researched, explored, deliberated and stalled so many times with this decision because whatever decision I landed on felt intuitively “off”. I would convince myself that a place was the one and as the days went on, I would second-guess myself and begin looking at other options again. Not only that, but I would self-serve a platter of guilt for being too “practical” about the decision at times. I wanted to make sure the decision felt right, not just look good on paper. It had been a zero-sum game for some time in my head.
The clarity hit me right on time. The transits in my natal chart highlighted: unexpected insight and window of opportunity – providing support and alignment around my future path. One morning during that very transit, I awoke with the sudden insight of having been looking at the problem incorrectly. I had limited myself to using only numbers when the solution to the problem required both numbers and letters – which is why I would only get so far and then quit. Now that I had letters in my toolkit, I could take another look at the formula and begin to solve for “x”.
It wasn’t just replacing ‘OR’ with ‘AND’, but fundamentally rewriting the equation. Rather than: “this OR that?”, I tried:
“What would my ideal experience look and feel like?”, and:
“How would I like to design this experience?”
These new pathways opened up possibilities that existed outside of the parameters I imposed by only asking: “this OR that”. I had been asking the wrong question all along. This insight allowed possibility to flow and ideas to emerge that were restrained before. Instead of potentially settling for “this” and not getting “that”, I was able to ask the question in a way that felt limitless and ultimately, empowering.
So now, I’m creating my preferred experience from scratch. What it entails. What it looks like. What it feels like.
No more “this OR that”. Just: what do I prefer now?
What epiphanies have you had lately?